Story of a {Bro-ken} Soul

[Alida]

I'm burning in the heavens
And I'm drowning in a hell

-

The sound of hoof beats reverberated through the land, the sound of a clock striking time echoing into the emptiness of life as each second slowly passed. The slight figure of a mare bathed in porcelain crossed the empty scene that was now cloaked in the cool of coming winter. Winter breathed thickly upon the lands, the cool questing for the weakness of fall. The femme could sense it in the very depths of her marrow that winter did not have much longer to wait - fall was soon to relinquish its grasp upon the earth. The plants withered meekly from their roots, fear etched in the lines of everything as life waited with held breath for the onslaught of darkness. The white fae watched without emotion as chromatic colored leaves drifted slowly downwards to earth, abandoning the trees in light of the coming days of death. Everything was loud silence that pressed upon the usual ongoings of nature, a quiet scurrying of activity as animals rushed to find means to make it through the coming apocalypse. The fae supposed she was one such creature, surrendering to the beckoning of nature to wander here with the guarded purpose of finding a mate. She believed that desire had nothing to do with it for she had no desire for equines of the male kind. They had already offered her abuse once and she was wary of providing them with the opportunity to do so again. A sigh escaped her parted velveteens, slipping coldly past her enamels as she stepped forward with what was left of her prided dignity, a youth grown up before her time with the weight of the world resting upon scarred shoulders. Her hooves carried her without direction, stretching to display the beauty that could be found in her figure. Beauty, that is, when glimpsed from afar. Up close the world could see those scars that blended so effortlessly with the white of her coat: the blemishes painted across her back that marked the day she had abandoned her family, the deep bite mark the shadowed stag had left upon her withers as a reminder to all the world who she was. She was marked, painfully so, in the sorrow of her memories. Even though in a time long since passed she had learned to not let it affect her overly much, she could not hide the frayed edges of her pelt, could not erase the poison that had invaded her brain and refused to leave. To all those who chose to glance upon her with mild interest, she simply showed that gentle smile and meek appearance that hid the destruction that lay beneath her marred canvas. She appeared as everyone else among the crowd - one struck by the hand of pain that valiantly refused to show weakness in the face of daily adversity. Well, that was not quite truth. In reality, she did not possess the talent of gallantry that she gave lie to in every opening of her velvet-framed lips. Now, was her pain greater than that of any other? No, it was not. She had simply selected the path of shame the moment she had torn away from the image of her mother's body bright within the grasp of flame with that guilt hanging forever like a noose about her fragile neck. She had chosen it the second she had begun her wild run through the darkness those years ago. She had chosen fear over perseverance. She had allowed the pain of her past to consume her; and in that, she was different from the others.

Sudden determination raced through the femme's form as she raised her visage high into the air, walk increasing in cadence as she strode boldly upon the loam. In spite of her past, she could still raise her tiara in the noble vision of her heritage. She could still be beautiful despite her many flaws. Who knew? Maybe someone would find even her flaws beautiful. She scoffed at the brief length of that thought, however. Who could see her for the person she really was and bring her out from beneath her rock of hiding? She knew the answer was no one but herself, but there was a part of her that refused to believe that, refused to put forth the effort in an attempt to overcome the anxiety she had raised within. A slight drizzle of rain began to fall from the heavens, beading upon the lengthening hairs that comprised her pallid pelt. A smile raised the corners of her lips as she thought the weather was in perfect unison with her current state. Sparked forth in her mind was the image of her mother relaying to her the story of the creation of the world and how often there was rain when the gods cried for the pain of their creations. She paused, then, to shake the length of her body to free herself of the accumulating water that was beginning to plaster her coat to her skin, attempting to rid herself of thoughts of her mother. She was here for a reason, after all... maybe for a new beginning that could build a wall to delay the impending danger of flooded darkness at least until disaster could again strike. Her pinions stretched forward again to continue motion, ever passing into the future of time. Again the clock sounded upon the dying turf, the beat of eternal revolutions. Her auds focused on the sounds, now: the roll of her pedestals as they graced the ground in a four beat movement, the soft rustle of grass kissed by the autumn breeze, the solitary chirping of a bird that refused to be dampened by the weather, the trembling branches that shook in fear before the malice of winter. Orbs surveyed the land, noting the desolation rather than beauty of fall. She nearly shied as a particularly large leaf snapped perilously from a branch to drift fatefully to the floor, briefly interrupting the smooth and consistent cadence of her stride. She slid forward once more, though, now aware of the leaves that fell all around her as they collected water in the veins of their existence until they could no longer take the continued pressure and cascaded to the ground. Perhaps it could be considered the scene for a dismal party with the leaves and rain as confetti, the naked trees and dewy, abandoned webs as banners and decorations. Her plumage slapped against her flank in unknown irritation as her hips swayed with the rhythm of the world around her. Scents of few other equines assaulted her nostrils as she inhaled deeply of the aromas of life. All else was the scent of death, of unclothed wood soaked in rainwater, and of parched earth that was being quenched with the falling tears.

Forward effort halted as the mare heaved a great breath of air into her lungs, nares distending and contracting with the rhythm of incessant breathing. She stood there calmly, allowing the sensations of the world to accost her. She who never spoke more than was required could appreciate the quiet, but the silence of this place was almost too great for her. The pounding of her heart could be heard inside the cage of her body, thumping in attempt to create heat for the cooling mare. Steam rose in slow curls from her body as her temperature began to cool in response to the weather around her. She almost wished that she could simply let herself freeze and move no more, end the beating of her heart so that she would not disgrace the world with her presence. But that was mostly a lie. In the desolate numbness of that particular moment, as Alida permitted herself to be bathed in the frigid water of the sky, she realized that she was lonely. She had so long been detached from the world that she did not even know what it was like to be close to someone, to share thoughts and feelings without fear and constant angst. All she ever did was push away those who attempted to breach her solid barriers. The harder they pushed, the more desperate she became until they left her completely. And then she would regret her actions and mope upon later reflections. Such a fickle beast she was, she thought as smile graced her maw. Too bad that she couldn't change just by circumstance. No, if she was to change, then she had to put herself forth upon the altar of time. And now, she wanted a mate, even though she feared the thought of such attachment. That was why she was here now, not only because of created necessity, but because of desire. It was only that she was scared, but then, she was scared of everything. Why should she let this fear be her downfall like all the rest?

-

My soul is in a coma
And none of my friends can tell
That I'm reaching out and getting nothing
This is just a story of a broken soul

[George]

Here's the post Sorry for the delay.
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^{Ok, seriously, this weather has to stop or I’m going to kill someone. God I have to get home. The weather had gone from bad to worse. Still the grayish clouds loomed overhead, taunting the creatures below with the lack of the warm and wonderful sun. With the lack of sudden bursts of lightning and random outcries of thunder, one might say where he had traveled the weather became much nicer. Except now, the air is much colder. It’s so cold that his skin shivered with the icy wind and his lungs burned with each intake of breath. And in George’s mind, cold equals bad or at least this kind of cold. Back home, in his land of Delayas with very slightly rolling hills of lush grasses and cool waterfalls with a pool underneath, the weather is warm, as much as he knew. His guess is that the only amount of snow that ever touches the floor of Delayas is for two days, two glorious days at that. George could just see the pure white blanket covering the earth, sparkling with a small film of ice covering the edges of the pool and little cubes of it floating down the stream. He could smell the pureness, almost like a cleansing of all the sins and impurities he had brought along with him to the lands. But who knows, the land had only been his for about the sum total of a day. Could be that when he returned, it would be just as cold as it is now, here. The snow could be as grey as the depressing sky and stick around for ages. George shivered, pushing forward through the howling wind with a powerful canter.
.
The path he followed now is not the same path he had come by. His intention had been to return home, and hope Animando would follow, however, what if she didn’t return home with him? What would he end up doing then, wait around, being lonely, frolicking and singing to himself to pass the day away? Uhhh… he’d like to think not, but let’s face it, when we’re lonely or bored, we tend to do some pretty random stuff. But with that thought, he quickly had a change in plan. George would go around and try to find another mare to meet and possibly convince to return home with him. Ok, so he had told the beautiful Spanish mustang that he would be going home, and had almost begged her to return with him. Yeah, changing his plan and going against his word would not be such a noble thing to do. But George wasn’t always decent. And, it was just a small, tiny little mishap. He could easily pretend he forgot or something. Who really cares if he doesn’t do exactly what he says he’s going to do. Seriously. You can’t expect someone to do something word for word, and if she did, she can deal. It didn’t seem like she even liked him that much anyway, so maybe she would never know, never having gone to Delayas. She had seemed a bit odd. He felt a twinge of guilt with this inaccurate thought, knowing he was only trying to make himself feel a bit better, but he pushed it aside. George did believe in his excuse. And if she had decided to leave with him, to return to his wonderful land, and did find his actions improper, then he’d just have to make it up to her in a big way. But if she left, George would hunt her down and steal or fight her back to prove him to not only her, but to himself. Letting one go, thinking that way about him because of his actions and not hating him because of his personality alone… yeah, he wouldn’t be able to live with himself. With that comforting thought, he focused his attention ahead.
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An odd clearing appeared in the middle of the woods, just in front of him. Beyond it, about fifty yards or so, the wood started up again, the trees towering as tall as ever. In the shade of the trees lingered a beautiful grey mare, about 16 hands or so. Her color was very bright, almost radiant in the dark and dreariness of the woods. This is so my luck. He stepped out into the clearing, bound and determined to win this mares heart. But, just as his head had made it far enough past the coverage of the trees, something hard pelted his head. And then again, something hit hard on his back. Staring bewildered around him, he watched as the grass started to become weighed down as hail poured suddenly from the sky as if from dumping a bucket. Dashing back into the woods for cover, he waited. The small ice pelts bounced about a foot or so from the ground and made a huge racket from hitting the trees overhead. George jumped to the side as one random ice ball found its way through the mess of leaves over head and landed itself on his shoulder. He watched the whiteness in front of him that was blocking his vision of the mare and rather distant trees. Then, just as quickly as it had started, the hail stopped. The cold wind picked up and the sky remained that dismal dark grey. George walked out into the open clearing. The ice underfoot crunched as he made his way to the mare. Arching his neck, he pranced her way, showing off his muscular body. Damn, I’ve finally found a place were the land is good and the girls are pretty. She was a beautiful, luminescent grey who seemed to light the area around her considerably. Stopping at a fair distance so as to try and be polite, something he rarely was, he relaxed his neck a tad.
.
Hey, I’m George. It sounded a bit corny, but whatever. He’d have his good looks make up for it. George smiled playfully, cocking his head slightly with his eyes dancing. It’s his McDreamy look, simple as that. Hopefully, he played it well enough for her to play into it.}

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mift.
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[Alida]

Lead on to save me
Lead us all there
Find me some answers
One nation beware
Can't tell the difference between myth and man
Or what's necessary or where I should stand

~~~~

The cold had begun to spread like a disease over the earth, stretching so stealthily over the reaches of ground with paws of frost. The frigid air swept over Alida, chilling her to the bone in her stationary state, wrapping like an arctic scarf about her figure. The cold crept up her legs, digging into her bones with piercing needles as it groped to steal the warmth from her body. The rain above turned to snow as the time passed, gently drifting down in the form of miniature crystals to settle upon her alabaster form. At first it had melted upon contact, cold battled back with the weapon of warmth; but then the flakes had begun to accumulate into a mantle that painted her back, settling in the tendrils of her mane and tail like innocent particles of dust. The snow coated the lashes of her eyes, building up until it formed like ice that blurred her vision. Her lids fought to close over her dark hazel optics, struggling against the power of that fading hope that maintained the steady flow of blood seeping through her veins. She nearly wished to surrender, but she had grasped that realization of desire for companionship too tightly to permit such a thing as cold to conquer. Yet it was such a delicious temptation to simply allow her lids to flutter to a close like the falling of a theater curtain, heartbeat adjusting to the freezing temperatures until it slowed in something so teasingly near to death. There was a false warmth that had now consumed her body, willing her to simply give in to winter's calling. She felt numb, alone, afraid. There was nothing for her now except that cry of nature, that hand of death that reached to envelope her body and lay her so peacefully to rest. How had she been so stupid as to consider coming here in the first place when she knew she would only be met with failure?

Darkness met her orbs as focus fought to return her to the surface, ringing an alarm in her ears that caused eyes to snap open so that gray world again filled her vision. She felt like someone who had nearly drowned, battling through the dark currents of swarthy waters to surface so that she might fill lungs with vital oxygen. Determination almost unwantedly spread a blushing warmth through her veins that was momentarily filled with verve as she blinked the crystals from her stiff lashes. Breathing that had since slowed as she had approached a dangerous slumber again quickened its pace, hearbeat pounding loudly into the muffled silence of falling snow. She did not concede to move even though instinct pressed on her urgently to retain former blood flow, but she did agree that life was more precious than the simple folly that had possessed her before. No, she would wait longer, but she did not hold the knowledge of how much longer she might last considering the ominous elements. Her mind may have been a scarred battlefield, but her body exhibited great strength when she was of a mind to call on such reserves. Most times, she simply did not care. Let the elements do what they might with her, let them toss her about like a mere plaything that could easily be disposed of and replaced. Her gaze drifted upwards through her crystal lashes, vision distorted, but maintaining the ability to view clouds that darkened in anger above through the boughs of leafless trees and evergreens. She startled slightly as lightning struck a blow at the earth, streaking through the sky like a jagged scar of illumination. Thunder was soon to follow, snarling at her with menace as it breathed chilling breath upon the ground. A vicious shiver ripped through her spine, but she remained immobile, unmoved by this current storm of fate. Hard eyes tinged with an unknown sorrow returned to the ground as the shivers became more frequent, breath escaping in something close to wheezes from her lungs as air slipped through her windpipe. Still, despite her current weakness, there was unused strength brewing beneath that thick pelt marred invisibly with the blemishes of scars, a kind of sadness that was absolutely beautfil radiating from her figure. She appeared as an ice princess standing resolutely amidst the danger of the storm, waiting with calm for the unknown to occur.

Shock briefly overwhelmed her as eyes caught what may have been another equine drifting in the distance. From what her blurry vision could determine, part of him seemed to blend with the color of snow while the other was painted the opposite in a contrast of black and white. Might there be the possibility that he was heading towards her? Auds came up atop her skull, strained forward in interest at this other form as he approached seemingly in her direction. All too soon, he disappeared from view, the low visibility blocking further knowledge of his movements. Perhaps it had been a dream, a mere hallucination that had tricked her giddily in her delusional state. Suddenly she leaped forwards a step, heart pounding with racing intensity as what seemed to be a rock of ice landed on her neck and bounced off onto the ground. She breathed heavily in fear, lost in confusion as she wondered both where the thing had originated from and how she might escape from this new form of weapon. She shook her head wildly side to side in distraciton as ice pelted down like shrapnel all around her, coating the earth in hail and smacking down on her body with bruising force. She darted to the side beneath the branches of an evergreen that retained its color year round, existing beneath its wing of protection. The world became alive with the sounds of a battle as hail fell savagely from the sky, causing the branches of trees to bend and crack dangerously with the weight. In a moment, the fight had ended and the storm rumbled above in content at the havoc it had just caused, permitting a sort of tense calm to settle over the earth until it again found muse to break out in resumed chaos.

Alida walked cautiously from beneath the fan of the tree, stepping out once more so that she stood near to the place where she had once been. Her coffee orbs peered almost longingly into the maze of forest, eyes searching with a newly born pain for the equine who had been heading her way. Auds again pricked forwards atop her head as attention drew upon the blurry image of the same horse she had witnessed earlier, trudging powerfully through the fray in her direction. A strange sensation of relief swept through her body as he moved closer and closer, even while her form remained filled with the same impassive calm she had maintained previously. A small smile played across her features as she watched him display his brawny strength for her benefit. Laughter bubbled up inside her, but she halted its release. Oh no, do not misunderstand her, she was certainly impressed by his presence, she simply found it amusing that anyone, let alone this stallion during the death of winter, should come to her and try to win her with a show of power and strength. As if she was actually worth it. She lowered her muzzle to the earth in a form of greeting, gentle breath disturbing the layer of snow that had settled there so that flakes flurried about her face. She inhaled deeply of his musky aromas, spurred by instinct to memorize it so that she might be able to recognize him anywhere. Eyes gazed at him from beneath the mask of her lashes, studying him cautiously. He came to a stop a comfortable distance from her and her neck rose by degrees so that it was level with the rest of her body. The twinge of fear that accompanied conversation with other equines began to build in some distant corner of mind, cold distracting her briefly as a shiver rippled through her body, but her attention remained steadily on this two-toned stag. His colors were dissimilar to most solid equines she had witnessed and his difference intrigued her. She had grown amidst a herd of simple blacks and whites, so to see a mixture of the two shades caught her attention as interest was piqued. Soon his lyrics were ringing forth to disrupt the silence the snow had brought and her audits swiveled in response at his deep baritones, noting the underlying hints of emotion that were buried unknowingly in every word that escaped from parted lips. She stared deep into his liquid eyes, smile twitching at the corners of her mouth as his expression came to her as one of enticement. If he thought she was simply going to fall into his arms like some lovesick maiden, he was sadly mistaken. Some part of her she refused did indeed desire love beyond all things, but unfortunately for all around her, the stallion that had cursed her in her past had made her wary of all. No one deserved it, that, she knew, but she could not break free from her instinctual nature to be distrusting. That look though, it was so inviting. Everything about him, even his simple greeting, seemed inviting, calling for her attention. Yes, in some strange respect, he was different, and that brought an unusual smile to grace her lips.

"I thought perhaps you had gone..." Her voice was breathed in a strangely sweet whisper, different from the acrid pain that generally showed beneath her lyrics. Generally she might have offered any potential suitor who dared to approach some biting remark that was served against her true will to drive them away. She had such a kind heart, but she was so cold to the world, so distrusting of fate. The delerium of current frigid temperatures that had settled firmly like a clasp about her form seemed to be altering her general behavior, permitting true emotion to slip past the bars of denial and reach the ears of those around her. It removed her inhibitions that plagued her mind, allowing her to open up in truth where once she was filled with lies. "I am Alida, but you may call me Ally or Lida if you prefer. Most seem to find my name a burden upon their lips." Rueful smile twisted her maw as she spoke, voice emerging with greater confidence than before even though the cold sapped at her strength. "Well, nice to meet you George. Such a wonderful day for meeting, yes?" Eyes danced with some form of mischief, but her orbs quickly dulled to their former appearance. She blinked once, lids slipping shut slowly over her optics to open again and find him there, that expression still plastered to his face. Was that a tinge of sadness buried beneath the layers of his eyes? Mouth turned to a frown as eyes remained locked on his, but she cast the thought aside for a later moment. By no means did he seem to wish to show weakness to her during the current time of plight, and she was content to observe his actions as they occurred. She watched him with body as still as stone, simply watching, waiting.

~~~~

The whole world is different now men have died
They can just sense this feeling in our eyes
Like no one's hands are big enough to hold onto this fear
And no one's hands are strong enough to fix what happened here

ooc: No worries about the wait. It was worth it, I should say. *grins*

[George]

Omg I'm sooooo sorry Alida! My life suddenly got buisy. I hate to keep you waiting this long . Vacation is coming, so life should be back to normal, lol. my post is coming... really. it is.

[Alida]

Pffft, people seriously need to stop apologizing to me. WE ALL HAVE A REAL LIFE!!!
Okay, had to get that out of my system, haha. Don't worry, I'm waiting, I'm very patient, and if you say that you're post is coming, then I am content.

[George]

{haha, nice way to put it. But now I feel extremely guilty. It's bad enough to make you wait a week, but 12 days!? Seriously that's not ok on my part. Someone should shoot me. lol, I definitely should have made time to post. So I'm really sorry no matter what you say, because waiting sucks... as does this post which now you have to read... sorry for that too. haha. Hopefully you can find something in it to write about, after making you wait so long and all.}
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T<sup>he faint film of snow covering all of the forest floor and the evergreen needles shone a bright grey, bringing out the full shine of the mares color. A soft breeze washed through the area, leaving small pinpricks of icy cold poking at his skin where the air had hit. As he remained in place, his body cooled from his journey, and began to feel the true temperature that surrounded them. The snow was an icy blanket, and as still as it was, added to the freezing, drowsy effect. Letting his muscles slide and twitch under his skin, he attempted to keep warm by forcing his body temperature to stay at a higher degree without seeming twitchy or impatient. But the cold continued to slide over him, enveloping him without its mercy. Watching the mare in front of him, he shivered a little, trying his best not to look too cold in front of her. But this feat became increasingly hard. Trying to distract himself from the bitter cold, he watched the mare more closely, only to find a faint layer of snow remaining on her back, with miniature icicles dancing from her maw. Frost covered her eyelashes. The mare looked completely frozen, like the winter had captured and encaged her here, remaining still and silent until the end of time. George’s face fell a little. He was going to speak of her appearance, and how cold she must be, but he caught something else in her eye. Watching those brown eyes behind her frost covered lashes, he saw what looked like pain, perhaps from a memory, or of course, from this bitter cold. Either way, he caught himself feeling even worse for the mare. Again, he found himself wanting to speak, but the look in her eye made him hesitate, wondering if compassion would have the opposite affect. Perhaps George reminded her of another significant equine in her life. But then she moved, it was slight, numb from the cold making movement hard. But the mare smiled. Then she spoke, words ringing softly in his ears, barely above a whisper. ‘I thought perhaps you had gone...’ She was glad he came. He smiled back encouragingly, filled with renewed pride. George stood a little taller. He was the hero who had come to save the day. But, looking into those eyes he couldn’t help by find the bitter cold, and the frost that surrounded them, threatening to take her, freeze her to a temperature she would not be able to come back from. His smile dropped a little for a second time, but he fought with himself not to let it go fully.

Why was he trying to lie to her? Why wasn’t he showing the fact that he is concerned and the fact that she could very well die if she didn’t start to move, didn’t become warmed up? Did he think that pretending he didn’t notice would be more comforting to the mare? She spoke again, halting his thoughts. ‘I am Alida, but you may call me Ally or Lida if you prefer. Most seem to find my name a burden upon their lips.’ Alida… It’s a pretty name. It seemed to fit her. She was lucky; names didn’t always end up that way. Some say that is the case with his, George, however, he liked the name. It had a way of being very simple, and yet, not plain. ‘Well, nice to meet you George. Such a wonderful day for meeting, yes?’ And that’s when her expression turned to a comforting one for George. Her eyes showed mischief, and her face showed an appearance he used quite often. She wasn’t dieing. And if she was, she either wouldn’t have an expression shown when in a happier mood then dieing one, or she didn’t want him to know. She didn’t want to seem weak. And if she didn’t want him to know she couldn’t be hurt that badly, right? So she had to be fine, unless of course, she didn’t want him to know. Now George was very confused. Is she fine or not? That’s when he remembered the look in her eye she held earlier, the look of some sort of pain. She is definitely suffering, and she doesn’t want me to know. For that very reason, the look, he chose to do something about it. George took a step forward, allowing his face to show his true concern. “Alida, you look freezing-” Paused with one foot suspended in mid air, he stopped, thinking better of this action. Glancing down at the ground, he attempted to regain his former appearance. For the very reason he had chosen to move forward, he had stopped. That dark, chilling and painful look in her eye suggested that perhaps, she wasn’t sure weather or not she trusted the male kind. Of course what did he know? It was way to confusing, and seriously, he was no good at guessing what she was actually thinking, or any of this emotional, psychology crap. That’s a mare’s job, because a male isn’t going to understand, though he may try. Returning his gaze to her with a compassionate smile, he decided to play her way. Because, after all, as far as he knew her mischievous gaze suggested that she wanted him to do the same, go that way, be only that forward… right? Again he was reminded with that fact that he really didn’t know, and the fact that he was trying to understand this insane logic is pretty amusing. It gets way too intense, and way too complicated. But from experience, he chose not to ignore it, because then you end up with no mares. And George really wanted her.

“Yeah, it’s just perfect.” He laughed a little. It was harder then he thought to be like he always is, and act how she wanted him to act. The bits of ice on her whiskers made it almost impossible to pretend she was fine, and act like she was fine. “It’s very warm, and humid.” Humid? Yes. Warm? No. “But, I do know of this place, down south where it’s even warmer, hot even, and there’s a gigantic field with lush green grass and a bubbling waterfall of fresh, clear water… Of course, I would understand why if you wanted to stay here.” Smiling he watched her. Ok, so that was being forward, but it was bound to slip out at sometime. He could try and restrain himself all he wants, but there would be no way for him to stop it from coming out. That is just his nature of being. He kicked himself, metaphorically speaking, because after all of this careful, quiet and restrained act, he could have very well blew it with his last sentence or two there. But anyway, he couldn’t hide the fact that they were both cold, and wanted warm air. Thinking fast he tried to think of something to say without making the situation worse in his part. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be too forward, or offend you in any way. It’s just...” so cold… Wishing he hadn’t even started that sentence, he tried again. “Well, I’m the lead stallion of the land Delayas, the place with the grass and waterfalls and stuff, and I’d really like to have you join me there. Perhaps as my lead… I know we just met, but that could change…” Again, he watched her, focusing in on her eyes, the keys to her soul, anxiously waiting her reply, hoping it was not too much to ask too soon.</sup>

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{modified. XD}

[Alida]

ooc: Shoot you? Ahhh, noo, we wouldn't want to do that. Despite the obvious reason, I also like George too much for you to die, hehe. No, don't feel guilty, it's fine, really. And you're post did not suck, either. I liked it a lot. So don’t beat yourself up for stupid things. *glares*
Well, I should have a post up soon… My muse is a little elusive at the moment, but I almost have it, yep.

[Alida]

Show me how it ends, it's alright
Show me how defenseless you really are
Satisfied and empty inside

----

The cold had enveloped her, twisting about her body like a bitter vine, invading her defenses until the numbness had spread across her figure with groping hands. Darkness sat there in wait of her soul like a grinning demon, remaining as it always had since that night of fire, growing further after the night she had stumbled upon that abysmal black stag. It watched without concern as the cold threaded through her body until she was stiff with the chill of winter, simply waiting with hidden glee for the elements to steal her warmth so that she might submit to the calling of fear. The faint drumbeat of her heart sounded steadily into the silence of the clearing, the low thud resounding from the place where it was buried in her chest. Alabaster skin twitched as a shiver slipped through her body in an attempt to warm her cooling figure, but vigor had almost gone for even that small concession to occur. Puffs of frosty breath curled slowly from her nostrils with every breath she expelled, dissipating into the stillness of the atmosphere like a fading dream. Why she still stood there, alive, she did not know, but waning strength still forged through her body. The ember of hope that spread faint warmth throughout her figure was still determinedly present, prodding her desperately to move even though she stubbornly continued to refuse its urging. So slowly she was evaporating into winter’s waiting bed like a whisper of wind, drifting off into mere memory as some fleeting dream that is forgotten before the morning wakes. But then there was this stallion, George, who stood before her with his kind, worried gaze locked on her figure. She thought perhaps she might stare into those glass pools forever as they studied her openly, confusion darting fleetingly across his countenance while his steady gaze never wavered. For some reason, his handsome presence gave cause for her to want to heed that dying spark within her that pleaded for her assistance in survival. His attendance of this despondent party had proved her silent accusation incorrect; someone in this wretched world did care, and the surprise of that thought shook her into awareness of her current state. There was now a reason for her not to die, a reason for her to live, and that reason stood resolutely before her, clothed in the colors of black and white with the pleasant title of George hanging about his figure. She might be wary of the male gender, but for him, she wanted to offer trust. After all, didn’t he deserve at least a little trust since he had trekked through the blinding snow to reach her? He could have returned to whatever haven he must surely have come from, but instead he was out here, risking life to the brutal cold that sought to slay all struggling forms of life, to share words with her of all cursed creatures.

Eyes were drawn to the masculine figure after her wispy statements had been spoken into the air for his auds to capture. His two-toned coat shone both in brilliant similarity and in contrast to the world around them, gleaming in its splendor. Somehow her eyes were drawn to that coat, mesmerized by it as if it were some puzzle that her mind needed to piece together in order for it to make sense. But it didn’t need to make sense; it was simply a pelt, something that kept you warm in temperatures similar to the ones they were experiencing now. Even despite this simplicity of that thought, she found herself admiring it nonetheless. Dark almond eyes turned to greet his, noting there the open expression of struggling concern lurking in their depths. She peered at him curiously, waiting for him to speak when at last the words “Alida, you look freezing-” escaped from his lips. She watched the leg rise as if to move towards her, and then set back down as uncertainty conquered. She saw the indecision in his lurid eyes, but also the kindness, the desire to bring her kind warmth and not harm to her freezing form of carved ice. Still, the dark side of her brain that was cursed by the past and cast in shadows brought forth a twitch of distrust, caused her to feel fear even when there was no reason to feel as such. But those words that had fallen from his lips… if she could have drifted into in any more shock than she existed in currently, all movements would have stilled and gaze widened to stare at him with open-mouthed disbelief. But instead she simply stood there in that numb state, as unmoving as if she had grown roots into the frozen soil hidden beneath the blanket of snow. Eyes peered out at him curiously from beneath the frozen lashes as silence ruled the moment while she struggled to attempt a response to such concern when at last lips cracked opened to breathe words of acknowledgement. “I am… very cold, yes.” Her voice was soft with a melodic beauty hidden beneath the lyrics of sound even though the words held a certain wariness. However, there also lurked surprise at his statement, surprise at the thought that he might find concern at the state of her already broken figure. She could see from the intensity of his eyes that he wanted to offer her warmth, but he was not going to test his limits so soon. That alone caused her to wish that he was closer, that he had followed through with his movements even though that thought was accompanied by the accustomed twinge of fear that was founded somewhere deep within the confines of her brain.

A warm smile spread across his features that seemed to light up the clearing, directed at her in a caring manner even though the hazy, disturbed confusion was still vaguely present beneath the compassion along with a trace of sadness. Her heartbeat sped a little at that look as he surveyed her, drum-like consistency becoming slightly more rapid as she fell into the beauty of that smile. It reminded her that some good things still remained on this earth, and perhaps this George was one of such blessings. Maybe the world was finally about to offer her something pleasant in the years of her life as opposed to horrific and traumatic. She returned the expression slightly, lips twitching upwards to form a lopsided smile as eyes gazed at him with tender, dancing content that defied the clinging cold. The smile drew wider as he concurred with her previous sarcasm, but slowly drew to a thoughtful frown as he began to describe the lands where he must surely have come from. Fear raced like a cold chill through her mind at the thought of being kept somewhere with a stallion, any stallion, even though she knew the fleeting feeling was completely unwarranted. George had been nothing but kind to her, and now he was offering her his home to share, albeit somewhat slyly. He was not speaking of his home as a cage for her to dwell in, but rather a haven where they might go to escape the cold. Her mind traveled around the description of the place, the cold leaving her briefly as she imagined that the snow surrounding her had disappeared to leave her with benign sunlight painting her back with warmth. Ah, that thought was a pleasant one. All too soon he was speaking again, fumbling over his previous statement and she returned to her state of numbness. Another shiver twitched over her body as she returned to the feeling of endless cold pressing her from all sides. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be too forward, or offend you in any way. It’s just...” Yes, so cold. She wanted to tell him that he hadn’t offered her offense, that he had done nothing wrong by speaking of a warmer place where they might go, but he was already speaking again before her lips could crack open in reply. “Well, I’m the lead stallion of the land Delayas, the place with the grass and waterfalls and stuff, and I’d really like to have you join me there. Perhaps as my lead… I know we just met, but that could change…”

Auds twitched curiously atop her skull at his words, smile curving at her lips in slight response. Her? A lead? A rustic, harsh laugh managed to rumble forth from her throat even though her throat burned at the sound. “Me? Your lead? What could possibly give you the idea that I might be a good leader? I am nothing but a weak coward.” Immediately she admonished herself, mortification at being so forward racing through her thoughts. Eyes glanced downward as she nearly winced at her own words. She should be flattered by his statement, but it was just so shocking that anyone, let alone this handsome stallion, ruler of Delayas, should ask her to be a lead. Sure, she had been the prized daughter of the alpha stallion and mare in her birth herd, carefully groomed through her youth to become royalty, but the events of her life had crushed that imperial spirit within her so that now it existed only as fine dust, even if she could still at times manage to raise her head high in the prided beautiful image that was her birthright. Eyes turned to the ground in bitter sorrow as she recalled those events, the ones that had left the scars upon her back that were now hidden by snow, but she carefully drew herself up again to squarely meet his gaze, thoughts settling within her mind like puzzle pieces that were falling neatly into place. “But I would like that to change… very much so. I would like to get to know you.” The words were whispered softly, nearly inaudible, but with an unwavering strength that was determination burning beneath the lyrics. Eyes again fell briefly as she continued in apology for her previous outburst. “I… am sorry. I did not mean to be so… harsh. I am flattered that you might offer me the position of lead, I just… do not feel worthy of such status. At all.” The last words were spoken low with a cold acerbity to them that was absolute. “I would like very much to come with you. I would like to see the beautiful Delayas that sounds so wonderful and warm when you speak of it." She paused briefly, studying him before she continued with curious intent locked in her soft gaze. "You draw me somehow, George. In a way unlike any other. I am simply not used to… this.” Not used to what? Equine interaction? Being courted by a handsome stallion that she actually liked quite a lot and was not repulsed by? Being asked to be a lead so soon, even if it was only mentioned in a sly manner? The answer to all those questions was yes. She had no experience with these things; most of what she knew and had solely focused on had been the cage of pain she had dwelled within for the past three years of her existence. Well, perhaps now was time to break free, for the bird to fly from her cage of sorrow.

Another shiver distracted her from the intensity of her thoughts and she found she almost could not move. The cold had now invaded her entire body, tethering her to that accursed stance. Immediately fear pressed on her like a dark blanket as she considered that she might be too sluggish should something attempt to attack her, that she was too weak at the moment to protect herself. Not only that, but night was slowly stretching darkness across the land, preparing to swallow her up in an abyss of fear. Her fear of the dark was overwhelming, but she was not about to give in to fear now of all moments. She could not run this time. Eyes darted quickly around to look for predators as breath increased in rate, but she attempted to calm herself, to allay her fears. There was nothing to be afraid of, nothing at all. No matter how many times she told herself this, however, she never believed it. Eyes again came slowly to meet those of the stallion before her and a thought came to her mind that caused lips to part once more. “Please… come closer. I am so cold.” She shocked even herself as her mind screeched at her in warning of such a request. What was she thinking to ask a stag who must surely only want her for her usefulness to him to come closer? She threw those foul and baseless thoughts aside as she attempted to steady herself, eyes studying him cautiously for a reaction. The truth was when she looked past that wall of fear, she did greatly desire that he draw closer and she almost needed his warmth at this desperate point in time. She never wanted him to leave. And she trusted him enough for such a small concession at this time, did she not?

----

In this land of make-believe, dead and dry
You're so cold, but you feel alive
Lay your hand on me one last time

It's alright

[George]

I've been grounded. I was bad. lol. But you know how parents are, they won't give me a definite date as to when I can get back on. But, I've been trying to sneak on and get something together whenever I can...

[George]

Hey honey! Thanks for being so patient. You're amazing. I'm not sure I could have been. I'm sorry to say this, but I may be quitting for terrible reasons... read my post in the OOC chat for more details... hopefully now I have computer privileges back, I can come back fully and reply soon and we all can forget this... um, thing. lol. At least I hope… I’m sorry.

[Alida]

Don't worry, I understand completely about not getting to come on. As I've said before, parents can be really lame when they want to be. Not to mention we have lives and it IS the holiday season, which is probably the craziest time of the year. Fortunately I'm good at being patient, hehe. I hope you don't have to quit... that would be terrible. If you do have to quit though, I understand. I would probably do the same in your situation. Hopefully we can get this resolved before it gets to that point though. *sigh*

[George]

{Ok, I'm just going to pretend it's still winter for this, and we can make it spring at Delayas. }



Huh... wait, what!? Gorge was silent and absolutely still. The words, ‘Me? Your lead? What could possibly give you the idea that I might be a good leader? I am nothing but a weak coward.’ he had been completely unprepared for, and caught him entirely by surprise. So he stood there for a moment, just standing there like a fool, unsure of what to do or how to act. Actually, he wasn’t really thinking about how to act, he was just standing there, trying to let the words she had just spoke in response settle in his head. They made no sense to him as if she was speaking a different language, and his brain wouldn’t let him comprehend. After a moment of so of this utterly confused blankness, he blurted out, “What?!” The words she’d spoken replayed in his head again. ‘Me? Your lead? What could possibly give you the idea that I might be a good leader? I am nothing but a weak coward.’ Warming up his brain he finally allowed himself to try and understand. She was surprised he had asked, and didn’t want, nor think she could do the job. But why? Yeah, George had no idea. She was beautiful, which is something some would consider completely off topic of whether a mare was fit to be lead, except George had other ideas and reasons for having them. If a mare was beautiful, first, they would become more intimidating, and second, the beautiful ones from his experience are the ones whom always managed to hurt him. Never, except for his experiences here, had he ever been hurt by an ugly one. Yeah, they had beaten him around a bit, but they had never hurt him emotionally like a drop dead gorgeous one when they flick their tail in your face and wonder to themselves aloud why either it suddenly smells, or why they always have to end up dealing with the weird guys. Yeah, beautiful mares had their ways of getting what they want which is necessary when holding the position of lead. If he made a decision for the herd she didn’t agree with, Alida would have no trouble changing his mind. She is also smart, and for obvious reasons that is important. Put the two together, and in his opinion, that mare would have no trouble being lead.



And that’s when it occurred to him that he had been a tad foul with his outburst, even if it was out of surprise. But George did nothing to change it. Alida was already speaking again in a whisper. ‘But I would like that to change… very much so. I would like to get to know you.’ So then it’s a yes? He smiled, through the bitter, icy cold. She said yes, she said yes! ‘I… am sorry. I did not mean to be so… harsh. I am flattered that you might offer me the position of lead, I just… do not feel worthy of such status. At all. I would like very much to come with you. I would like to see the beautiful Delayas that sounds so wonderful and warm when you speak of it.’ Not worthy? If anyone was worthy of this position it would be her. How could he tell her that? ‘You draw me somehow, George. In a way unlike any other. I am simply not used to… this.’



“Alida, from the moment I saw you from behind those trees over there, I knew you were more than just a girl. There was something about you that made me stay through the hail and right then, you made my only desire to know you, to love you. I can’t explain why or how you did it, but you did. From the looks of it, you’ve been waiting in the cold for a long time, patiently wondering when your life may change, and I feel like the luckiest stallion in the world to change it. When I look into your eyes, I see so many beautiful things, but I also see sadness, a sadness that creates a knowledge and strength so great that any problem you face won’t be able to stop you.”



He moved closer, staring into her eyes. Gently, he moved past her on her left side, tenderly brushing up against her and circling around her to her other side. He breathed softly, and whispered close to her ear.



“If that isn’t worthy of being lead, then I don’t know what is…”



{haha, Crappy post. But I don't care because I like it. It's short and sweet, . So I don't know if you want to make an exit post or not, it's up to you, but we can just like, post in Delayas with our arival and the turning to spring.}

[Alida]

[ooc: I'll make an exit post and then would you make a post in Delayas? And pshh, your post wasn't crappy at all. I liked it... it was very sweet, hehe. ]

****

All of the things that I want to say
Just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

----

How cold she had become, the winter embracing her soul so that she had become like a carved statue of ice. She observed with a sense of growing detachment as the confusion crossed the painted stag’s striking features at the sounding of her voice; saw the inner struggle to grasp those spoken words. She felt a need to shake him, to make him comprehend the words she was speaking and why they did have a right to fall from her lips. Didn’t he know that she had abandoned her family when they needed her most? Didn’t he know that she had been raped and hadn’t even possessed the strength to defend herself? Couldn’t he see the scars that marred her beauty? Didn’t he know that she might as well have been a worthless piece of dog meat? But no, of course he didn’t know, for she had not yet burdened him with the tales of her tragedies. She wondered briefly if he even held the slightest notion of what deep, dark hole he was about to enter at such a nonchalant waltz. The impulse to run rushed through her body with a flash of heat that defied the slinking cold; desire to flee from these lands so that she might not curse another with her woes filling her so that she became filled with anxiety. What was she thinking when she had told him that she wanted to follow? She was surprised that she could be so selfish as to permit such a profanity. Surely there were better prospects around than her wasted body that was slowly succumbing to the elements. She was nearly about to part her maw in an attempt to retract her words in denial of her previous statements when his own mouth began forming words in response. Somehow, through the tortured haze of her thoughts, his words reached her like a distant, deceptive song that came from a dream. All thoughts halted abruptly at the sound, pausing in their endless, mundane circulations to make room for the entrance of his words that enrapt her as if she had been caught in a particularly dangerous spell.

The speech he had offered her stunned her into absolute silence. How was one to even attempt a response to such words? Eyes simply stared at him as if he had somehow become an alien figure from an alternate universe. She sought to find a suitable reply within her broken mind, stammering incoherently with teeth grating against the cold until finally her maw simply closed again in surrender with wide eyes gazing into his. No one had ever spoken to her in such a manner and never had she afore even dreamt to hear such words. Always she had been equipped with a tongue that knew the ballet of lyrics equines partook in, and yet now she was rendered incapable of speech. She simply stared without shame, the only movement present in the tendrils of moon-washed mane and tail that were lifted by the gentle arctic breeze. At last her thoughts again found movement as she focused on what he had last spoken to her. Was it that obvious then, her sadness? She was almost disappointed that she could not hide her pains from the world, but could not dwell long on the thought for soon he was moving with the subtle, confident grace that further drew her unknowingly into his trance.

She watched with wary gaze as he approached, muscles automatically tensing against her own volition. Instinct rushed through her with the accompaniment of adrenaline, entreating her to run as he came within reach. For perhaps the first time in a very long period of pain, she felt the touch of another and did not flinch from his presence. No, instead ligaments that had been stretched as taut as bowstrings eased as his side brushed against hers, body gathering heat from his presence to leave a tingling sensation racing through her spine that was not produced by the dreary weather. She felt as she had never felt before, muzzle dropping a few inches from its previously alert station in repose as nostrils released a wearied sigh. The tension slowly melted from her body as he circled around to her other side and for once, she permitted the fear to ease from her mind. For once, the alarm was not present in response to his close vicinity, but instead an emotion altogether different enveloped her body to provide a sense of burning comfort that flouted the cold. Soon his breath was whispered against her ear with an accompaniment of more words that sent a chilling warmth spreading through her body. “If that isn’t worthy of being lead, then I don’t know what is…” For a moment, she could say nothing at all, only revel in his closeness with his breath so near to her exposed aud. The quiet sound of their breathing seemed to echo into the muffled silence of the clearing and lids briefly fluttered closed over umber orbs in response to the sense of peace that settled over her with gentle hands. How wonderful it felt to breathe in this moment, with that burning sensation fighting through the desperate hands of the cold. If she could have died right then and there, she felt she would have died the happiest horse currently pacing the earth. Surely there could be no better feeling that this, right now, as she stood beside this kind stag with the dual-toned coat of black and white. Beautiful, the moment was beautiful.

Too soon she had to interrupt the acquired peace with her own ringing, bewildered voice. “I-I-I don’t know what to say…” She had never before been so dumbfounded by a stag, so surprised in such a manner that left her feeling breathless and strange as if she were living inside a particularly vivid dream. She paused a moment in thought, suddenly feeling compelled to mouth the words that had been churning somewhere in the lost depths of her mind as he had made his little speech. “You know, you are amazing.” She might have been embarrassed by her short outburst of emotion, but no, not this time. She was not afraid. Slowly, she gathered strength from her inner source of waning strength, drawing herself up to her full height with dial tilting to powerfully meet his gaze. “I will be your lead, George, if that is what you desire.” The voice was soft, but still present with power. “But please, I beg you to promise me that if someone comes along who is better than I, you will replace my station with another. I will accept only on those terms.” Her eyes stared into his with intense fervor, orbs pleading with him to accept her “terms.” Love and guilt could exist as powerful forces and she did not want George’s vision clouded by a desire to keep her in command even when she might so obviously be inferior to another. She would not stand for that. If there was one better, then Alida would gracefully step down and the new mare would take her place. Unwavering gaze held his for a few moments before she again drew her focus straight ahead so that sight wandered among the snowbound trees. Nary had a moment passed when very carefully, she broke from her frozen state of stillness with the lifting of one hoof, guiding it to the side so that the rest of her legs and body followed suit. Soon she found herself pressed up again George’s side, fur brushing ever so softly against the pelt of the stag who was by some unknown means capturing her heart. A rare, infectious smile creased her maw as she considered this new beginning that lay before her, the expression spreading until her features were nearly aglow with a happiness that dulled the ever-present sadness that ailed her mind. Eyes again roved to his, muzzle coming to rest tentatively against his jowl so that her velvety kissers brushed his cheek. She drew back, gazing at him with something akin to wonder and complete contentment that she had not felt since perhaps she had been held in the lost innocence of childhood. The cold was forgotten, the only thing present now a subtle warmth that was blossoming in her belly. “Well then, my knight in shining armor. Shall we go adjourn to your kingdom?”

----

Cause it's you and me and all other people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why
I can't keep my eyes off of you

ooc: Lame, I know. I might edit it some later if there are spelling or grammar errors. I'm too lazy at the moment..
Oh, and I know I left it kind of open ended, but you can just ignore that. That would also be because of my laziness.

**Alida has left.

[George]

"I Promise"



George has left